you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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