We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
