is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
