I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
