I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
