the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
