i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
this beer tastes like vomit already
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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