i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
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he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
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& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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