so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
