im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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