READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize
