erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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