This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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