don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
