Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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