i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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