Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
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