am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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