just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
