If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
