he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
