Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I CAN MOONWALK!
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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