Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
i need some magic done to my vagina
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
