ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
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