Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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