S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
