I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
