I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize