and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
