He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Why are your pants in the freezer?
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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