he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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