How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
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