I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
