I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Randomize