One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
