Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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