Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
