i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize
