1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize
