every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
