Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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