There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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