so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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