I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Randomize