I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Randomize
