oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
