I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Randomize
