i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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