so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize