I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Randomize
