why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
